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Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans

Posted by Mr. Nice Guy on July 25, 2009

It took me a while to finally see this movie, but I found it well worth the wait. Thanks to NetFlix, I get to see all the movies that I miss in the theater. SPOILERS AHEAD.

I like the story line of how the Werewolves were turned into the Lycans by the Vampires. Lucian, was the first Lycan that could transform at will and then back into a human, which gave them a greater advantage over the first Werewolves.

Victor was crazy as usual. He was as cold hearted as can be, even killing his daughter, which you know from the first movie. I liked his character a lot because you could tell he loved his kind, but had to make hard decisions in order to keep things from getting out of hand.

The rebellion didn’t make much sense to me though. The guard gave Lucian the key the night before they were to escape. What gets me, is why not pass around the key and remove all of the collars just before the escape? They could run much faster as Lycans and more would have escaped.

I also don’t understand how Vampires died from having their throats cut. Maybe I missed something, but I though it took a steak through the heart, silver bullets, garlic, and crucifix to kill them. I wasn’t aware that they needed to actually breathe to be immortal. Mabye they do.

Overall, it was a good movie, and worth seeing. The last one is like Twilight, but with a lot more fighting for the guys. Check it out if you haven’t already.

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Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen

Posted by Mr. Nice Guy on July 24, 2009

Before I kick off this review, just know that the concession stand prices are ridiculous. $28 for 2 sodas, candy, hot dog, and pretzel.  We’re going to 7-11 before the movie next time. SPOILERS AHEAD.

I have to mention the previews because they are worth mentioning.  Here is what’s coming to the theaters, that actually looks good:

2012 – About the end of the world.
G.I. Joe – You should remember from your childhood.

And the greatest news I’ve ever had…

Avatar: The Last Airbender (Live Action) – If you haven’t seen the cartoon, rent it because the movie looks like its going to be the shit.  M. Knight Shamylan is making it.

Ok, now on to Transformers.

1. This movie is long as hell. About 3 hours, so if you have to take a piss, do so before it starts.

2. The movie is funny as hell. Lots of kids, personally the comedy makes it worth seeing.

3. For the fans of the ORIGINAL cartoon, they added the GoBots. Yep, the tiny AutoBots that fucked shit up.  They are funny and ghetto as hell.

4. Some Decepticons switch sides and join the AutoBots, which makes it kind of interesting.

5. Optimus Prime gets his ass kicked by Megatron and Starscream, and they kill his ass.  Yep, they kill Prime. Megatron shoves huge sword through his back and that’s that.

Not much to say about the movie. They did a good job and its definitely worth seeing.

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Angels and Demons – Movie Review

Posted by Mr. Nice Guy on July 24, 2009

Ok, I saw this movie last week, but it was so garbage that I didn’t want anyone else to go see it based on what I wrote. If you haven’t seen it, buy the book, its 100x better. Oh yeah, SPOLERS AHEAD!!!

1. My first problem with the movie is CERN, why the fuck isn’t it a major factor in the movie? In the book, 90% of the story was based around CERN’s super collider.

2. The girl’s science “partner” in the movie is really her dad in the book. Its part of what makes it look like other things are going on.

3. The director of CERN is completely left out of the movie, and he is a main character in the book.  In fact, most of the book, you think he’s the guy behind the Illuminati.

4. All of the kidnapped priests die in the book, Not just 3.

5. The assassin has no idea he’s working for the Catholic church… He does in the movie…

6. Langdon and the girl fight and kill the assassin… Not in the movie…

7. There is also a fight scene between Langdon and the assassin in the book when the priest is drowning… Not in the movie…

8. Langdon goes up in the helicopter with the Carmelengo at the end and survives the explosion… Not in the movie…

9. The Carmelengo lands on the roof and pretends its a miracle… Not in the movie…

10. The Carmelengo fakes a vision that leads him to the canister in Peter’s tomb… Not in the movie…

11. The Carmelengo burns himself on the roof in front of everyone and doesn’t scream… he kills himself inside and screams in the movie…

There’s probably a whole lot more to mention, I just don’t feel like going on and on about how fucked up this movie was… Don’t go see it…

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X-Men Origins: Wolverine – Movie Review

Posted by Mr. Nice Guy on July 24, 2009

Ok, so I was all hyped up to see this movie for the last 6 months, and I’m kinda disappointed.  For those of you who don’t want it spoiled, stop reading here.

For starters, they made Wolverine and Sabertooth brothers in the movie.  All comic book fans (myself) know that Sabertooth was his father.  Disappointing but the spin was good.

Wolverine becomes Weapon X in the movie, but they ended that part of it way too early, and leaves off just before the 1st X-Men movie begins. For those of you who know about the Weapon X program, Wolverine ends up fighting the HULK, Shatterstar, and my favorite, Omega Red (wasn’t in the movie).  Omega Red is one of the dopest comic villians in the X-Men series.  Not only did he not fight Omega Red, who was the ultimate Weapon X, they screwed up Deadpool, and made him some kind of hybrid that looks like Baraka from mortal combat.  Very disappointed in that.

Gambit, who is also one of my favorite characters, doesn’t have much of a role, and I’m actually surprised that he’s not in the 1st X-Men, since it is him and not Ice Man that has the crush on Rogue, and him and Wolverine get into a beef over her. I guess they took some stuff out to appeal to a new generation.  In the comics, Wolverine fucks with Rogue and Jean Gray, and that’s why Scott Summers (Cyclops) doesn’t like him, in case you didn’t get that in the 1st movie.

The Blob was introduced, but not as a complete bad guy, and that’s surprising too since the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants consisted of, Magneto, Pyro, Quicksilver (in the movie), Mystique, Frog, and The Blob. The Scarlet Witch joins later, and fucks up the entire team, and the X-Men.  She’s a bad bitch, and should be in the next sequel as the main villian.  If not her, then Appocalypse.  I’m thinking “The Rise Of Appocalypse” would be the biggest movie in history, as long as they don’t pull this Wolverine crap again.

The end is very anticlimactic, but the fight scene is pretty tight.  Its not like the end of X-Men 2 (Great Ending), but is toned down a lot and only lasts for a few minutes which results in Cyclops blasting a couple of people, and Wolverine, Sabertooth, and Deadpool having a three man fight on the top of a nuclear reactor. Guess what? Somoene falls off, as if we didn’t see that coming. What makes it so stupid, is the fact that they spend the entire fight trying not to fall off, only for Wolverine and Sabertooth to jump off the top of the thing at the end of the fight anyway? WTF?

P.S. Neither Wolverine, Sabertooth, or Deadpool can die except by getting their head cut off.

Just wait until it hits the video store.  Not worth the $21.50 I paid. Fuck Stan Lee and his writers for taking one of the best comic book series and turning it into 2 hours of movie garbage. For those of you who didn’t read the comics, you might actually enjoy it.

SUBSCRIBE!!!

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Obsessed – Stupid Bitches

Posted by Mr. Nice Guy on July 24, 2009

I just saw the movie Obsessed and I’m disappointed and shocked at how dumb some females are. Warning: SPOILER ahead.

If you haven’t seen the movie, this is your second warning not to read this if you don’t want to know what happens.

First things first. Why are some women so damn dumb? Lets do some math. If you have been married to someone for 3 1/2 years, are you going to believe their word or the word of the crazy bitch that wants your man? Of course the dumb bitch (Beyonce’) believes the crazy stalker bitch over her husband, even after the crazy brawd flirted with her husband right in Beyonce’s face.  She then proceeds to tell her husband what she noticed, but she’s too damn stupid to realize the bitch is crazy and wants her man.

Lets move on to the next dumb ass female in the movie, a guy. Yeah, a flaming gay secretary that can’t stop running his mouth Stringer Bell’s (Idris Elba/Wire) business. So he tells the crazy bitch where he is going, what time his wife is leaving, and what time he plans to leave the next day.  Beyonce’ of course forgets to turn on the alarm and fights the crazy bitch in the house. I have a good question.  Why does Idris Elba run his mouth so damn much to his gay secretary? I’m assuming pillow talk.

Stupid bitch number three is the babysitter. Why the fuck are you letting strange people in the house? Why didn’t you ask to TALK to Beyonce’? Am I the only one that noticed the phone wasn’t even on?

Now for the crazy bitch (sexy white girl from Heroes).  Her and the woman detective were the only two people that had any damn sense.  The detective detected that the sexy white crazy girl was crazy. The crazy brawd was smart enough to manipulate everyone in the damn movie.

On a personal note, the crazy girl that is attracted to black guys is played by the sexy white girl (Nikki) on Heroes, that plays a crazy lady with split personalities that is married to a black guy. How’s that for typecasting? From now on, I bet she plays the crazy white girl with a thing for black men.

I’m just curious why some women are stupid enough to risk messing up their marriage because some random brawd that they don’t know, says some shit in order to get you to ruin your marriage. If you’re not mentally challenged, you should put two and two together and figure, “Hey she wants my man, so let me NOT fuck up our relationship because that’s what the crazy bitch wants me to do.”

By the way, yeah, it happened to me once. LMAO. A random girl called my girl and told her she wanted to give me head, but she wanted to know if it was ok with her. What? LMAO. She really believed the chick for a minute and got mad at me.  I was actually with the other girl when it happened, but she was the girl my homeboy was kickin it with, and she was just startin shit cause I left my phone laying around.  My boy is real funny cause I’m sure he put her up to it.  That’s ok though, I got him back when the gay guys kept calling his dad’s house looking for him, but that’s another story.

I know I went off on a tangent at the end, but oh well…

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